Looking more relaxed
There’s no way for me to sugarcoat it. The last 10 months have been rough. It’s taken time getting used to my dynamic eyesight.
In December I met with, Ken Kreager, an old friend of mine from work that had suffered severe burns, in a gas explosion, when he was 8 years old. Upon seeing me back in August, for the first time in nearly a year, he exclaimed “what the heck happened to your eye?”. On this occasion he was just as direct, which I appreciate. He told me that it took him 30 years to get over his burns. The looks from others and the whispering.
I’m a very direct person, so I appreciated his candor. He went on tell me that he thought I looked different. He said, “you seem more relaxed.” I’d never heard that before. Most people either ignore the subject of my appearance or they tell me, “your one eye looks more open than the last time.” I appreciate that. Although I’m not always sure how to respond. It’s probably not appropriate, but I wish that the people with questions would ask them.
It’s true that there are times when I don’t think about it. It takes me a while to adjust in the morning. Most of you probably feel the same way. Long days still make my good eye droopy. But, I can do things that I couldn’t do a month ago. Like plugging small objects into the computer or turning a screw driver. Don’t get the impression that I’m becoming a handy-man. Let’s not get carried away.
The feeling in my foot won’t seem to go away, but it’s a liveable situation. I’ve recently started to do Wii Fit exercises that include Yoga. Now I hear that Yoga may be bad for you. Geez! First coffee and now this? Well, maybe the exercises will help me with my “slight” balance issues.
I am starting to enjoy driving more now. Those first few months were nerve-racking. Night-time rain is still a little unsettling. I have to choose my words carefully. Connie will read this. I know it still makes her anxious when I get behind the wheel. Unfortunately, there’s a healing process for all of us.
My great-nephew, Hunter Wagner, had a baseball game this summer. It happened to be one of the games that Grant was umpiring. One of the 9-year old boys from the opposing team looked at me and asked, “what’s wrong with your eye?”. I told him that I had been sick and it just didn’t want to open.
When I saw my 4-year old great-niece, Grace Baginski, at Thanksgiving I could tell she had a question. It didn’t take long after dinner was over. She looked at me and asked, “what happened to your eye?”. For a brief second I considered explaining my situation to her at a 4-year old level. Then I broke formation and told a lie. I said, “well, it’s from playing too many video games.” Her eyes got a wide as mine aspire to someday. I should have told her right away that this wasn’t true, but I waited. When I fessed up she had a look of disappointment in me. I had lied and was sorry. Nobody is perfect and I’m not nobody.
At the same time, I remain grateful for all of what I do have.